May 15, 2014

Resources for Discussing Grief and Loss


As a follow-up to the March 2014 presentation by Dr. Carol Dickhaus about talking with children about grief and loss, here is a list of the books that Dr. Dickhaus provided as possible resources.

Books to read with your child:

Water Bugs and Dragonflies by Doris Stickney
When Dinosaurs Die by Laurie Krasny Brown & Marc Brown
Lifetimes:  The Beautiful Way to Explain Death to Children by Bryan Mellonie & Robert Ingpen
What is Death? by Etan Boritzer (this book offers descriptions of death through the lens of a variety of cultures and religions)
Tear Soup by Pat Schwiebert & Chuck DeKlyen

*Dr. Dickhaus graciously donated a copy of each of these books to Redeemer's MOPS library.  If you would like to borrow one or more of these, please contact the current MOPS coordinator.  (Our MOPS library is a new gig, so we're still figuring out where the books will be located and how the borrowing process will look.)

Books to read for yourself:

Talking with Children About Loss by Maria Trozzi (covers various types of loss - death, divorce, disability, and others)
When Children Grieve by John James & Russell Friedman

Additional books:

I came across this list of books in Honey For a Child's Heart by Gladys Hunt.  (Honey For a Child's Heart is a wonderful book with a variety of book lists categorized by age and topic, offering a wealth of suggested reading material for you and your child from infant through high school.  I often take this book along to the library to help me find new books and authors to share with my son.)

I selected the books indicated for younger children, although Gladys lists several books for older elementary children and young adults as well.  The descriptions accompanying each book are Gladys's.

Papa's Gift by Kathleen Bostrom, il. Guy Porfirio.
A beautiful story of the friendship of a grandfather and graddaughter and their adventures together.  When Papa dies, little Clara refuses to be comforted, until she remembers what he had told her and sees with new eyes.  The wonderful illustrations alone are comforting.  All ages.

Blow Me a Kiss, Miss Lilly by Nancy White Carlstrom, il Amy Schwartz
Sara's best friend is Miss Lilly, who is very old.  They blow kisses to each other right to the end.  Ages 4-10.

Everett Anderson's Goodbye by Lucille Clifton, il. Ann Grifalconi
A lovely book.  A poetic telling of Everett Anderson's feelings as he copes with grief and accepts his father's death.  The book takes you gently through the stages of grieving.  All ages.

The Goodbye Boat by Mary Joslin, il. Claire St. Louis Little
Saying goodbye when someone you love dies is perhaps the hardest thing of all.  This book provides a message of hope that sadness will ease and that death is not the end.  Ages 5-10.

Someday Heaven by Larry Libby, il.  Wayne McLoughlin
Thoughtful, comforting, Scripture-based answers to common questions children ask about heaven and what happens at death.  All ages.

A Little Bit of Rob by Barbara J. Turner, il. Marni Backer
Almost everything reminds the family of their brother Rob.  They miss him from the moment they step into the boat on their crabbing expedition.  A book about how memories help us in grieving.  Ages 5-10.

Badger's Parting Gifts by Susan Varley
All the woodland creatures mourn when old Badger dies.  A beautiful book about sharing memories in your loss.  All ages.

My Grandson Lew by Charlotte Zolotow, il. William Pene Du Bois
You may need to get this quiet and thoughtful book from the library.  All ages.